Sexual confidence is not about being good in bed. It's not about having ripped abs or big boobs. And it doesn't come from having a lot of sex. While it can mean different things to different people, at its core sexual confidence is feeling comfortable in your body, knowing you deserve pleasure and being able to articulate what you enjoy — as well as listening to the needs of your sexual partner. Melbourne sexologist Kassandra Mourikis says people often think of it as a performance — in and outside the bedroom. If you struggle with sexual confidence, or just want to understand a bit more about it, you're in the right place. Sexual confidence isn't something we have or don't have, explains Dr Chris Fox, a senior lecturer in sexology at the University of Sydney. Ms Mourikis says while anyone can be sexually confident, it just takes some work. Knowing all bodies are good bodies and deserving of pleasure is a big part of increasing your confidence, Ms Mourikis says.
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