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A few weeks ago I went to a garden party hosted by an old friend. There were 30 of us there, all long-time chums aged 60 or older. I was having such a good time chatting and catching up that it was only later that it occurred to me there had been something strange about it. While the women had talked, laughed and reminisced, the men just went round with bottles of wine in their hands, filling glasses and saying nothing. They might as well not have been there at all. Yet if you prise these women apart from the ever-silent hubby by their side, they will never stop talking. As a single, divorced woman of plus, I sometimes feel desperate for male company and conversation. I got divorced in the late Eighties and then met a wonderful partner, the witty writer John Sandilands.

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Ahead of a work trip a few years ago, Chloe hinted to her companion she wanted to have sex along with someone else. While she didn't allow a particular person in mind, it had been a fantasy of hers for a while. That didn't eventuate, but the couple officially began a non-monogamous relationship earlier this year. An old friend had called Chloe en route for wish her happy birthday and they ended up catching up — after that sleeping together. That was the at the outset time I had sex with a person aside from my partner in 10 years, she says.

At once people just have sexual encounters. I became lovers with a sophisticated barrister I met on a skiing anniversary. When we got back to England, I discovered that he was conjugal, but I was hooked by after that. We carried on together for 11 years, and by the time it ended, it was too late.

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